Hiya Gorgeous,
Every time I’ve moved, started a new job, implemented a new wellness strategy, or ended a relationship, it was because I was ready for more. I’d learned what I needed for my soul growth, and it was time for the next lesson. Life had a bigger vision for me. Quite simply, I was ready to uplevel.
If your current situation feels stale or no longer fulfilling, it may be a sign that life has a bigger vision for you too.
But that doesn’t mean it won’t be hard. Sometimes, no matter how glorious or how necessary the uplevel is, we hesitate. The question is how to change?
Making friends with uncertainty.
Maybe you’ve been feeling itchy for a while. Perhaps you’ve fantasized about new opportunities but wanted more certainty before risking it. I mean, what if you change your current habits or situation and life actually gets worse? How do you know you won’t be making a huge mistake?
Well, my friends, sometimes it does get worse before it gets so much better. For example, when you improve your diet, there’s a really good chance you’ll have some detox symptoms. They’ll suck, ‘tis true. But once you’re on the other side of them, you’ll be shocked at how amazing you feel.
And get this—no matter what happens, every action we take teaches us more about ourselves. That is the essence of the awakened path and it’s how we become more of who we truly are. Even a step backward can catapult us forward, as long as we’re conscious and intentional about it.
Growing pains are inevitable, mistakes are necessary, and certainty, no matter how much planning we do, is impossible. And that’s what makes life so creative, educational and very much alive.
Cue some trusty Oprah wisdom: “There is no such thing as failure. Failure is just life trying to move us in another direction.” Cheers!
Know when it’s time to change.
So how do we decide if it’s time to try something new? Necessary life shifts often come with aches, pains and trackable symptoms. For example, what used to feel good or help you unwind now feels like a bad habit. What inspired or challenged you now feels tiresome.
Behaviors that got you by are no longer working. Your head says, “stay put” but your heart says, “move on.” And I can really relate to this one, your curiosity and browsing history have taken a new, alluring direction.
If this sounds like you, then whether you’re aware of it or not, you’re already starting to change. Yup, it’s happening. The train is leaving the station and in subtle ways your consciousness is pushing you to grow.
The trick is to accept that change before staying the same becomes unbearable.
Change before the relationship becomes toxic, before your eating habits ruin your health, before you get fired from your terrible job. Don’t wait until you’re up against the ropes. Resist change too long and you’ll find that your options are limited.
Instead, we want to tap into our intuition sooner. As soon as you notice that discomfort or dissatisfaction, pop open your inner compass. Get honest with yourself: “I’m not feeling this anymore. I think I’m being invited to uplevel. And I’m willing to take a leap.”
Have a strategy.
Change is scary, no matter what it is. One way that you can take back some control and give yourself a little bit of solid ground to stand on, is to have a change strategy.
Certainty is not possible, but there are things we can do to alleviate the worst of our fears. Knowing yourself is the most important thing here. Everyone reacts to change differently. Some embrace change, while others, like me, just want to crawl in a hole, eat cookies, and pretend it’s not happening.
Armed with self-knowledge, you can develop the strategies that work for you. But, here are a few examples of what you can do to help yourself during a time of change:
Get quiet.
Change can bring with it a lot of noise and distraction. Take time for yourself, to meditate or walk in the woods or just sit and think. Tune into your inner voice so your intuition can lead you.
Know your strengths.
Self-doubt is crippling, I know. So I like to journal lists of my strengths, experiences, contacts—all the things that tell me I’m ready for this change. Then, when negative thoughts creep in, I tell them how prepared I really am.
Get Support.
Sometimes when you’re stretching and growing it helps to reach out to those who have walked your path. Find someone who has started a new business or moved across the country—whatever it is you feel life is calling you to do. Give them a call or invite them to coffee. Pick their brain and enlist their support.
That’s the whole reason I started my Thrive Mastermind and Thrive Bootcamp. Running your own wellness business can feel overwhelming. It’s way more fun to be on this journey with great friends beside you and experts to guide you. Whatever mountain you’re feeling called to climb, find a community to join. Look for one that creates a safe space for sharing successes, brainstorming ideas, and conquering challenges.
You don’t have to go it alone.
Be ready to let go.
When you start shifting, other people will start noticing. They may even want the old you back, because when we change it often shines a light on other people’s blocks or limitations.
Chances are your friends and family don’t always like that, and they might not understand why things can’t be the same. Things can’t be the same because you’re not the same. Know that sometimes you have to let go of something and sometimes, someone, before you can let something new in.
While you were sleeping or dreaming or scrolling through your social media accounts, you started to have a vision for a new way of living. Once that seed was planted in your psyche there was no turning back. It was just a matter of time before your head came into alignment with your heart—and that’s a good thing!—no matter what discomfort it creates.
If this sounds familiar, it could be time for you to spread your wings.
This doesn’t automatically mean that what you have isn’t good enough or that you need to totally renovate your life. It just means that you have more potential than you’re currently using and it’s time to step it up and do the work.
Apply for the job, join the gym, do the cleanse, get your butt into therapy, try online dating and so on!
Trust yourself.
You know what you need to do, I’m just here to gently nudge you.
Will it be scary? Fuck, yeah! Fear will always show up in these moments. Part of fear’s job is to keep you safe. But fear doesn’t understand that in certain situations it may not be keeping you safe at all, what it’s really doing is keeping you stuck.
I remember when I left my acting career, sold my home and moved to the woods. People thought I was crazy, and I agreed with them.
At my house closing, I was terrified. I didn’t know anyone. I had no idea how to make a living (other than live off of the profit from downsizing). And I didn’t know how to be a homeowner (I’m not a handy girl).
But guess what I did know? That shaky-ass, freaky place was exactly where I needed to be. No maps, no manuals, just me finding my way and finding myself. That leap changed everything, and every leap that came after that was informed by it.
There’s no doubt that more scary leaps are ahead. I won’t always like them, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. As long as my intention is crystal clear and I stay true to myself, everything will work out for my highest possible good. And the same holds true for you, dear one.
Your rising requires a willingness to tip your hat to fear and do it anyway.
Each time we transform our fear into courage we get closer to our true power—our soul. And the more we bridge the gap between our human needs and our soul needs, the more we evolve.
Trust yourself.
The Universe will always catch you and place you exactly where you need to be to shine.
Your turn: What strategies have helped you navigate change in your life?
Peace and upleveling,
Exactly what I needed today. Thank you!
❤️
You’re amazing! I started a Pilates teacher training course on the weekend which I thoroughly enjoyed and felt like the right decision but was just having doubts as when I came home (to a different city) I got food poisoning and the two things combined have exhausted me, making me doubt if it’s not too much taking on such a change after turning 40 last week! After reading this I am reminded of fear and slowing down and that not everything propels forward in the way we might like. Blessings to you sweet lady who writes from the heart. Xx
I loved, loved, loved this post! It was very timely for me and helped me make sense of some things that are happening. In my meditation and prayer this morning I prayed for divine guidance for a direction and the next best steps and I believe it came through in this post. Thank you for being you, always inspiring, always you!
❤️❤️❤️
Hi Kris,
I don’t usually write to folks, however just now, this feels right. I first saw you on Oprah’s Sessions. More recently, I’ve been seeing you in the Hayhouse Writer’s Workshop that I am taking online. I love your energy and your authenticity. I can certainly appreciate your journey as I learn to embrace my own. I have a lot in me to give and share and I have started doing so. I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you for sharing your story. It has made a difference in my life and I haven’t even made any juice yet, though I will. As I listened to you today, I could see things starting to line up in ways I barely dared to dream of. Fear may be real but so am I. Today is the day that I picked the title for my new book. My fear has been creating the outline for it. But that is old news. I know what I need will come. I published a book of poetry last year called Letters to Myself. I started a blog. You have inspired me to reconsider how I handle it and what more I could do with it. This is exciting and great! I can’t wait to see what manifests. Thanks again
Halleluja F yes,I made a choice yesterday and I’m scared,but I’m going to do it anyway.Thank you Kris.
You are a joy Kris. I don’t visit your page for a couple of years, come back and there you are, shining brightly. A constant ‘out of comfort zone’ pusher, you have kicked my butt from across the globe in so many good ways. And after I had been making green juice, nursed my mother through her cancer (she lives) and then my father ( he died) within 3 months I had developed my own cancer. I looked at it, thought of you, told it where to go and carried on. Still working out what it was trying to tell me. A HUGE thank you for the brightness you spread, the no-nonsense wisdom, courage and vitality. The most alive person I (don’t actually) know.
Kriss I recently have become vegan , taking yoga classes and discovering new me. Thank you for all your love and kind wisdom .
This couldn’t have come at a better time my beloved Kris…I have been postponing going back to varsity out of fear of the unknown…especially for next year. I keep making excuses like who is going to look after my kids and stuff.I have been praying about it but I just couldn’t seem to be winning…I thank you for the work you are doing…you have no idea how you have saved me from myself …I love you
thank you Kris! right words at the right moment!
Kris. This is just what I needed to hear today. I love following your journey. I have read your books and watched your videos- including your documentary. You never disappoint. We need real people with real struggles AND real insight in the media. I get very tired of the polished up Hollywood version of life. I love your expertise in wellness AND your authentic voice. Thank you.
This post really speaks to me having just taken a leap of faith myself, leaving a very stressful job to give all I have to concentrate wholly on my nutrition career. I have been splitting myself in two believing I needed the security of a monthly salary but have suffered the consequences of an excessive work and stress load. I have followed you for some time Kris and you are truly inspirational. So pleased to have caught your interview on the HHWS and know that my recent decision came with a whole body YES! I am confident in the Universe and know all will be well. Thank you, ?
Thanking you for this beautiful post. It’s funny how life works. I have been torn with a decision – my head has needed a lot of time to catch up, my decision was semi made and then just before I had my phone call I read this post and it cemented my decision. Heart pounding, I’ve jumped off the cliff and trust that the universe will catch me. Big love x
I’m coming out on the other side of several massive life change. I moved to a different city, lived away from my family for the first time, started a new job after being at the same company back home for 7 years, and then called of my wedding three weeks before the big day because I knew that the person I was going to be making a huge commitment to was not the right person for me. I can tell you it was the most uncomfortable part of my life, so far. Being able to look back now, I am in such a state of happiness and gratitude for the courage that somehow just kept showing up! My life now is completely different, and all for the better. To anyone that is starting a journey no matter big or small, you’re going to rock it!!
You always know what to say Kris, thank you <3
Thank you Kris.
This is perfection
This is how I’ve felt for so long! My heart pulling me, but my head had so much hesitation. Finally, after many years, the right opportunity came along, and I’m taking the plunge! I quit my job and am doing what I love-working with animals. It’s what drives me. Great article! Thank you for your inspiring perspective and insight. ??
Congrats on taking the plunge! And thank you for dedicating your work to animals. xo, kc
Your post is incredibly timely Kris. After a heartwrenching and stressful 7 months, and the workplace issue ending resolved but unjust, I’m now awake to the signs that have been appearing for a long time now. It’s truly time to uplevel and leave behind what isn’t for me.
Thank you for this! It really struck a chord, and made me tingle all over. I’ve been working on a big project that I hope will create big changes in my life, and sometimes it is so hard, and so scary! But I think I will have to read and re-read this blog post to help keep me inspired and courageous. 🙂
Thank you for this contribution Kris and just wanted to ad that change is, yeah, SCARY… but, in the end, just as you said, its only a matter of time until it comes, again, knocking on your door like: Hey! it’s time to move away from “this”, whatever look it has. I ended up a 10 year old romantic relationship and even when I was terrified in the beginning, I cannot be more proud of myself now and today. That decision, leap, call it how you like, turned me into the amazing woman I’m able to be today. A standing ovation for our friend fear and for US not following his advice all the time. Love, Laura
I’m proud of you too! You ARE amazing. xo, kc
Wow. This is exactly what I needed to hear. I have been struggling with a big life change decision and my practical side is keeping me stuck because of the fear of the unknown. I need to trust that if I take the leap the uinverse has my back:)
Kris – this article is very good – congratulations on pulling together the heart, soul, and mind plus reminding us that taking action can be scary but so worthwhile. Trust yourself and the Universe that you will come out okay.
I love this post so much! It’s exactly how I feel right now. I am making some changes in my life that feel scary but at the same time I just know I have to make them. And perhaps that is exactly why they are scary – because no matter how silly that might seem, sometimes we might actually fear that our dreams MIGHT come true. Whatever it is, I have just recently started a blog, as writing is something I wanted to do ever since I remember just never making time for it or making way too many excuses not to do it. Ever since I started though, I feel like I am exactly where I need to be. Is it scary to be opening up to the world? Yes. It is. But it’s so exciting, too. And I can’t wait to see where this new adventure is going to lead me. Though, I do not have much sense now of what I am doing, or how am I gonna make a living… 😉
Kris,
Thank you so much for your post. As others have already said, this comes at a perfect time for me. My husband and I sold our house and we are making the move from the ocean to the mountains. We bought an off the grid cabin in Vermont 4 years ago and have slowly been renovating it so that we could make it our forever home. The opportunity presented itself for us to fast track our dream of living in Vermont full time and we will be moving in 3 weeks. My husband will continue to work at our business in Massachusetts while I am able to stay at the cabin with our fur babies and work remotely. It will be incredibly hard for us to be separated 4 days a week, but we both know the sacrifice will be worth it. Our hearts are at the cabin and that is ultimately where we want to be. My emotions have been all over the place recently. I prayed for peace about the move this morning on my way to work. Then I arrived at the office, read your post and that, along with the prayers, have made me feel better. Thank you for the encouragement and wisdom!
Hi Kris. The right words at the right time. I am struggling with the letting go of a relationship and your post gives voice to my feelings. Thank you.
Sending you loads of love Margaret. Xo kris
Oh gosh! This was perfect timing! Thanks! As I’m sitting here, I’m surrounded by moving boxes, haha! We are planning on listing our home to sell in a week or so. We intend to move to our college town, to be closer to hubby’s job. It’s exciting, but scary at the same time. I noticed that push back effect from others when I switched from being pescatarian to being vegan a year ago, so with moving, I kept things secret mostly because I like to protect my new things! I also had push back when I decided that being an author and coach wasn’t contributing to my health or happiness and I closed my biz end of 2015, a year when I went to 6 funerals, including my mom’s. Change is all there is and that is why I love being in nature so much! Nature is a great teacher for that. I relate quite a bit to the detox symptoms bit. I’ve always focused my diet on whole foods, but I’ve been cleansing in various ways over the past 3-4 years as I’ve given up caffeine, alcohol, animals products, corn, etc. I never ever “cheat” any more eating things that wreck me as celiac. These days, I’m not cooking with oil and getting my fats through avocados, seeds, nuts, etc. I decided to just roll with all the changes, since like the old Zen proverb…you can hang on or be dragged, haha! Love to all going through changes.
Thank you so much! This post could not have come at a better time in my life!! I was just the encouragement comfort and reassurance I needed as if you knew me personally for years.
Thank you for being real Kris. I really needed this message today ?
Wow, Kris, this is exactly what’s happening for me right now. I am 6 months post-treatmenr for breast cancer and I have been feeling that itch, that need to evolve. Often during my treatment journey I received many signs from the universe that my pre-cancer life was not for me, ie, my career, certain friends, even certain family members, and more importantly, old lifestyle and behavior patterns no longer serve the new me. As I grow into the me I was always meant to be, yes, the fear is there, but without it, I wouldn’t know that I’m alive. The space between no longer and not yet is undeniably scary but I’m getting comfortable with it and learning to fully embrace the new me. Before I got sick, I had fear but it was different, it held me back from growing and nourishing my own soul. My energy was overextended in many aspects of my life. Cancer, as dusgusting and traumatic as it has been for me, opened my eyes to myself and my needs. My grandmother always said “Know who you are.” I feel blessed to be on this journey, a transformed young woman who may finally know who she is. Thank you for your beautiful words of wisdom, as always. Your books have been by my side every step of the way. When I saw the job posting, I immediately applied because I took it as a sign from the universe. I continue to transform my fear into courage and to trust my instincts. Thank you for letting me share a little bit of my story on this journey. xoxo
You’re a rock star! xo kris
Kris, I recently had the delightful experience of listening to your interview on HHWS 2017. You are pure awesomeness, my girl! Well, as life would have it I decided, “This is it. I am changing things up. Fear be damned” I have committed to changing what goes in my body and will start a new job in two weeks. (hoping I haven’t made a mistake…can you feel me shaking in my boots?!?!) Deep breath. Also, I am 61, I believe my body is asking for change, so that I can navigate these next decades with grace, health and well-being. And even though I dont know exactly what to do to make myself feel better, I will implement what I do know and trust the info will come as I commit. Thank you for your joyful nudges! ?
We didn’t come here to struggle and to suffer.We came here to love.
Love & Joy!
Well said, Friend!
This is so apt for me right now….. thank you, the message came at exactly the right time….